One Afternoon
by Lady Belegwen Lightningblade
Summary: FiliaXellos. A conversation in the forest leads to joy . . . and sorrow.
1. Mind

One Afternoon

Part One: Mind

This is the first section of a three part story, four parts if you count the alternate ending. It's about two years old, and I've seized the opportunity to do some minor revisions . . . so it's slightly different from the version on my webpage. The second and third section will probably be even more greatly altered.

"You filthy mazoku!!!" The golden dragon shrieked for at least the third time that day. "Stay away from me!" 

The "filthy mazoku" raised an eyebrow. "I'm ten feet away from you, you know." 

"It's not far enough!" she replied, turning to look in the other direction. 

"What," he said, narrowing the distance to seven feet, "are you afraid of being contaminated? Is your holy purity as a priestess of the Fire Dragon King that precarious? You must think some simply dreadful thoughts to be so easily corrupted?" 

Her blue eyes narrowed, and he could see her jaw tighten. "Purity and holiness are not things that a mazoku would know about!" 

He leaned casually against a tree, looking amused, though she couldn't see it as her face was still turned away from him. "I would know about corruption and contamination, though, wouldn't I? You know, Filia, I didn't ask to be a monster. I was created this way. There isn't any particular virtue in being born a dragon, either. So, you were born of the light. You can't claim responsibility for your own natural inclination to goodness and nobility and so on." 

She sniffed. "Typical of mazoku to refuse responsibility for his own actions." 

"To be quite honest, Filia, Amelia is a better example of true goodness than you are. She chose goodness. You were born with it, thrust upon you or gifted to you. Where is the goodness and nobility in. . . ?" 

She wheeled around and slapped him. "How dare you - !" 

He allowed his head to follow the momentum of her slap, reducing the impact. "Well, that should teach me not to try to talk seriously with a dragon, shouldn't it?" 

"Urgh." She reached for her mace. 

"I suppose that's my cue to leave." He vanished. 

The golden dragon let out a frustrated breath. "Stupid mazoku," she muttered weakly. "Stupid, stupid mazoku." 

"Oh, then you want me back?" he asked, looking down at her from a tree. "It looks like you're crying from up here." 

"Go away!" she snapped. 

"Did I upset you?" He teleported back down. "My, it seems that I did. I'm sorry." There's was everything but sincerity in the apology. "No, I am." This time the apology rang true. "Why don't you explain why you're so angry with me all the time?" 

"You expect me to talk to a mazoku?" She glared at him. 

"What? You're afraid to tell me the truth?" He took her wrist gently in his hand and seated her beneath a tree. "Talk." 

"Don't touch me," she said dangerously. 

"If it pleases you," he said formally, amused smile returning to his face as he sat down beside her. "Now, why are you so angry with me?" 

"Obviously," she answered coldly, "You're a mazoku, a creature of pure evil who thrives on the dark side of humanity's emotions. Why shouldn't I despise you?" 

"As I said before, it is not my fault that I am a mazoku. I was created this way." He continued calmly, "For another thing, is petty violence really the best way to demonstrate your goodness, as opposed to my darkness? If you hate the darkness, very well. Destroy me. Isn't that a much more appropriate way to defeat darkness with light than yelling at me and hitting me with a little toy that can only cause pain? So destroy me. I won't even fight back." 

She looked at him with astonishment. "Really?" 

"Really." 

She hefted her mace thoughtfully. "Alright, I will." She concentrated a moment, and the mace shone briefly, before changing into a sword. Both the blade and hilt were golden, not like metal, but like sunlight. None the less, it was remarkably solid in appearance, nothing like the ethereal Sword of Light. 

"Demon-slaying blade?" he asked with mild curiosity. 

She nodded with satisfaction. 

"I'm assuming it is a manifestation of your will? Very interesting. I always wondered how you kept it hidden so neatly." He folded his arms across his chest and waited. "Go on. Destroy me with the force of your will, dragon. Or must I make you angry first? You have heard how I destroyed a clan of gold dragons with one finger, surely?" 

She made a sound of rage, as she plunged the sword towards his chest. The sword vanished up the hilt, and she stood above him, still holding the hilt inches away from his body. No blood spilled from his chest, and he made no sign of pain. 

"I didn't think you could," he said softly. "Didn't it occur to you that a weapon of your will would only work, if you truly wanted to kill me?"


	2. Heart

One Afternoon

Part Two: Heart

"Didn't it occur to you that a weapon of your will would only work, if you truly wanted to kill me?" 

She stared at what remained of the weapon of her will for a moment longer, before dismissing it. The golden hilt shimmered, then vanished from her clenched hand. Tears shone in her eyes, as she pounded her fist hard against his chest. "I hate you, mazoku! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!" 

"I think we just proved that was not the case, didn't we?" He laughed softly, then touched her golden hair lightly, stroking it with his slender fingers. "So if you don't hate me, why are you always so angry with me, hmm?" 

She pulled away from him and turned so that her hair hid her face from him. "I told you not to touch me." 

He straightened slightly, and a plain white handkerchief dropped into her lap. "Now let's be fair. I gave you an opportunity to kill me. I think you owe me at least this much. Come now, Filia, tell me why you are so angry with me." 

"I'm not telling you anything, mazoku," she said coldly, though she did use the handkerchief to wipe the tears from her eyes. 

"That's unusually self-controlled for you. Normally when you use that tone of voice you hit me." Abruptly, he grinned widely. "I think I know what it is!" 

"Oh, and what do you think it is?" she asked, attempting and failing to hide the anxiety in her voice. 

"Now this is amusing," he said. "I think you want me to know, but you're afraid to tell me. Don't be such a coward. Besides, not telling me is not very nice." 

"You hardly deserve nice treatment, mazoku." Her voice remained colder and harder than most glaciers. 

"It won't hurt you to say my name, will it? Try it, just once." 

She was suddenly intent on plucking at pieces of grass and wildflowers from the ground on which they sat. 

"Come now, say it." He pulled a small violet from her fingers and twirled it lightly between his. 

"Xellos!" she snapped. "Are you happy now?" 

"You care about my happiness? I'm touched!" He offered the purple flower to her. "It looks like a heart, you know." 

"I hate you," she snapped, hitting him again. 

As her fist contacted his chest, he caught it playfully and held it there. "Now the reason you are so angry with me. . . . What could it be? Ah, yes, I know! It's because you love me." He brought her hand up to his lips with one hand and placed the violet in her hair with the other. 

She tried to jerk her hand away from him, but he held to it with the tenacity of a terrier. "Xellos - " she pleaded .

"My name again?" he asked. "What? Am I wrong? Then why did you say my name like that? Surely, it is below a dragon to tell lies to a 'vile mazoku.'" 

She seemed confused for a moment, then shook her head. "Not that. Just, it was the wrong place." Surprising both him and herself, she pressed her lips against his. "There. I won't tell you anymore lies." 

His eyes widened. "Filia?" 

"Yes, that's why I'm always so angry with you," she admitted. "You win. I love you. There I said it. What are you going to do about it?" 

The purple-eyed demon looked at her for a moment, straightening the violet in her hair, and his hand lingered on her temple. "I think I'll find a more comfortable and more private place to answer that question." 

There was something almost wicked in her eyes. "What's more private than the middle of the forest? This grass is soft and comfortable. Or are you too hedonistic to lie on the grass and tree roots?" 

He raised his eyebrows at her, then shrugged. "I'm not the one who will be embarrassed, if someone surprises us. And I'm not the one who's going to be lying on the tree roots." Gently, he pushed her down onto the ground and kissed her again with more passion. 


	3. Soul

One Afternoon

Part Three: Soul

Filia rested her head against his chest and sighed deeply. "This was a mistake." 

"What do you mean?" Xellos asked, bending to kiss her hair. "Oh. Not finding somewhere more comfortable? I did warn you." 

"That's not what I meant," she said quietly, looking up at the tree limbs and the patterns the sunlight made through them. 

"Then what did you mean?" He closed his eyes again. "What was a mistake?" 

"This. All of it." 

He lifted her gently off his chest into a sitting position and met her eyes. "Why do you say that, Filia?" 

"Because it is the truth. I promised not to tell you anymore lies, didn't I?" Her smile was sad as she said it. 

"Why is it a mistake?" He caressed her cheek. "You love me. I love you, too, Filia. I don't care about anything else." 

"How can I know that? How can I know this isn't some whim for you, mazoku? No I'm sorry - Xellos." She shook her head. "No, it isn't a whim. I can see that in your eyes. That's not the problem, love." 

"What is the problem, Filia?" he insisted. 

"The problem is that. . . ." She looked at him desperately. "The problem is that it won't work, Xellos. It won't. It can't." 

"If we love each other enough, we can make it work." There was pleading in his voice, something that neither had ever heard there before. 

She shook her head. "Humans say that love conquers all. They're wrong, my dear. Will you still love me in a thousand years? You won't. You'll be bored and tired of me. I'll be bored and tired of you. We will either be split apart by that, or we will kill each other. That's if it could last that long, and it couldn't." 

"Why not?" he demanded. "Why couldn't it?" 

"Because we're too different," she said simply. "You were right earlier. I didn't ask to be born a dragon, dedicated to goodness. You didn't ask to be created a mazoku, the very essence of the darkest emotions that humans can have. We didn't ask for these things, but we are what we are, Xellos, and we would destroy each other. You know that. Light and darkness must coexist in this world, but they can't be in one place at the same time. One would destroy the other. I'm sorry, but it's true." 

"It doesn't have to be this way, Filia." 

"It does!" she told him. "It does, and we both know it. We can't remain together. We'll just wind up hurting each other, maybe even destroying each other. We can't go on like this. I don't want to hurt you, Xellos." 

"I don't want to hurt you either! I love you!" 

"I know," she whispered. "I do know." 

"Please." He looked at her through tears. "Please." 

"No." 

He wiped the tears from his eyes and held them for her to see. "A mazoku's tears. If a mazoku can learn to weep, can't we learn to live together and be happy, Filia? Can't we?" 

"It won't work, Xellos." 

He met her gaze for a moment, then sighed. "Alright. We won't do this again." 

"That's not enough," she said. 

"What?" 

Filia pulled the crumpled violet from her hair and placed it in his hand. "I don't want this to hurt any more than it has to, for either of us. Xellos, we must never be together again, and I don't mean just making love. I can't see you again. Ever. Please." 

"Filia. . . ." 

"Please?" 

He stood. "Alright, Filia. For what it's worth, you're probably right." He put the flower, back in her hand. "At least keep it for memories, love." 

She nodded shakily, then handed him a pink ribbon, the sort that normally was tied about her tail. "For memories, love." 

Xellos bent and kissed her deeply. "Then, goodbye." He vanished, teleporting away. 

Filia shook again, tears falling down her face. She looked down at the flower in her hand. For one afternoon she had held the purple heart of a demon within her hand. But, it wouldn't work. It couldn't. "Goodbye," she whispered, then collapsed into tears. 

Let me guess: you prefer happy endings? Well, you're not the first. My best friend ordered me to write a sequel with a happy ending. I decided that I couldn't do that, because I really meant for this one to end that way, because I really believed that sometimes love isn't enough. But I did write a happy ending version, that replaces the "Soul" section. I'll post that soon.

But as I mentioned earlier, I wrote this a long time ago. And my views on many things have changed. So, maybe a sequel will be written one day. Maybe. -- Lady Belegwen Lightningblade


	4. And Forever

And Forever  
  
**************  
  
This is the alternate ending for chapter three. The *happy* ending version.  
  
**************  
  
Filia rested her head against his chest and sighed deeply. "I'm afraid, Xellos."   
  
"What for?" Xellos asked, bending to kiss her hair. "Oh. About what your people will think? Filia, your happiness is more important than your reputation, isn't it?"   
  
"That's not it," she said quietly, looking up at the bright green leaves that hid patches of the sky.   
  
"Then what are you afraid of?" He closed his eyes again.   
  
"I'm afraid that we may have made a horrible mistake." She shivered against his chest.   
  
He wrapped his arms about her. "What mistake is that?"   
  
"This. All of it." Her voice quivered.   
  
He lifted her gently off his chest into a sitting position and met her eyes. "Why do you say that, Filia?"   
  
"Because I'm afraid that it's true." Her smile was sad as she said it.   
  
"Why would something so wonderful be a mistake?" He caressed her cheek. "You love me. I love you, too, Filia. I don't care about anything else, so long as I have you."   
  
"Is that enough?" she whispered. "Xellos, I don't know if it's enough. I don't know if it can work."   
  
"Why wouldn't it work, Filia?" he asked softly.   
  
"Because. . . ." She looked at him desperately. "I don't know. A dragon, a mazoku. How can it work?"   
  
"If we love each other enough, I think we can make it work." He smiled an entirely different smile now, nothing mocking in it. "Darkness and light were meant to be together, weren't they?"   
  
She shook her head. "I don't know. Humans say that love conquers all. But does it really?. Will you still love me in a thousand years? Or will you be bored and tired of me? Will I be bored and tired of you? Will we be split apart by too long together?"   
  
"A thousand years, hmm?" He reached out to touch her face. "I think we would only scratch the surface of our love in a thousand years, Filia. We may be angry with each other sometimes, but with all the differences between us, how could we ever be bored? A thousand years is not very long for either of us."   
  
"But we're too different," she said simply. "You were right earlier. I didn't ask to be born a dragon, dedicated to goodness. You didn't ask to be created a mazoku, the very essence of the darkest emotions that humans can have. We didn't ask for these things, but we are what we are, Xellos. You know that. Light and darkness must coexist in this world, but . . . but . . . ."   
  
"It doesn't have to be that way, Filia."   
  
"Doesn't it?!" she asked him. "I'm afraid, Xellos. Afraid that we'll just wind up hurting each other, maybe even destroying each other. I'd rather give up love now than have it ruined later. I don't want to hurt you."   
  
"I don't want to hurt you either! I love you!"   
  
"I know," she whispered. "I do know. Please, Xellos. Will it work? Be honest with me. I promised not to lie to you anymore. You must do the same."   
  
"I promise," he said. "No lies for you, my love. It can work. We just have to learn how to balance it."   
  
She relaxed then, as if an immense tension had left her body. "How?"   
  
He wiped the tears from her eyes. "Well, we both will have to make some sacrifices. Do you mind?"   
  
"What kinds of sacrifices?"   
  
He chuckled softly. "To begin with, you should probably give up that mace. Or at least promise not to hit me with it. In return, I leave the service of Xelas Metallium."   
  
"You can do that?" Filia looked astonished. "You will? For me?"   
  
"Easily." He leaned backwards against the tree again. "Oh, she'll be very annoyed with me, I'm sure, but I doubt she'll take the trouble to kill me. She'll just make it clear that if I ever come into her sight again, unless it is on my knees begging to be taken back, that she will tear me into nine hundred small pieces. Then she'll say congratulations and send me china as a wedding present."   
  
"I always wondered where you got your sense of humor." Filia leaned back against him. You really believe we can do this?  
  
he said. Filia, whenever two people come together in love, they must make allowances for the different people that they are . . . for us, the only difference is that the allowances, the challenges, are greater. Will you face this challenge with me?  
  
She smiled and stared up at the blue of the sky, seeing now the blue, not the leaves that obscured it. Yes, Xellos. Yes, I will.  
  
He pulled her around to face him. "That's good, because I'm not finished with you."   
  
"Oh?"   
  
I never will be. Then he was kissing her, and they spiraled downward into a repeat performance of that afternoon's passion. 


End file.
